Dude, Where's My Precious?
Written by Anakin McFly
Sam: Hey dude! What's that?
Frodo: It's a ring, dude!
Sam: What d'you know about rings, dude?
Frodo: Everything, dude! I'm a ring bearer, y'know!
Merry: Well, put it on, dude!
*whoosh sound*
Sam: Hey, where'd you go, dude?
Frodo: I dunno, dude!
Pippin: He's invisible, dude!
Merry: Hey dude, you're invisible!
Frodo: I'm invisible, dude!
All: Ooooooooh...
(Black Riders appear)
Pippin: Hey dude! What's that?
Frodo: Dudes, dude!
Sam: Are you sure, dude?
Frodo: Yes, dude! They've got weird faces. Like in one of those horror movies, dude!
Merry: Are they wearing anything besides the robe, dude?
Frodo: I don't know, dude. I'll check. (pause) They won't let me, dude!
Merry: Well, too bad then, dude!
Frodo: AAAAAH!
Sam: What's the matter, dude?
Frodo: Weird face stabbed me, dude!
Sam: What can I do, dude?
Frodo: Find an Elvish dude, dude!
Sam: Ok...
Frodo: Hurry, dude! I think I'm dying!
(Sam leaves and comes back with Elvis Presley.)
Frodo: What'd you bring him for, dude?
Sam: You told me to bring an Elvis dude, dude!
Frodo: No I didn't! I said to bring an Elvish dude, dude!
Sam: Sorry, dude!
Frodo: I'm gonna die, dude! *dies*
Pippin: Is he dead yet?
Merry: Course not, dude!
Sam: Hey dude, you dead yet?
Frodo: Yup.
Sam, Merry & Pippin: NOOOOOOO!
(Black Riders kill them all)
Black Rider #1: That's the last of them, dudes.
Other Black Riders: EXCELLENT!
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