We ARE, in this thread, talking about fan behavior. So it's all fodder, isn't it?

"I'm done." 4 posts and a day ago.

It kind of raises an interesting question - why are any of us here? 99.99% of people I see here are here to talk about Keanu - mostly about his work, which is very cool. As a matter of fact, "to defend Keanu and decipher Reeves." It can be successfully argued that Reeves only wishes to be deciphered to a certain degree, but that's cool and very respectable. He shares as he chooses. Good for him, and a good example. If someone is not interested in defending Keanu and/or deciphering Reeves, I have to wonder just why they are here. Nobody except Anakin can "tell" anyone what they may and may not do here, and Anakin seems very disinclined to do that. (yay!) There's always the element in fandom that just wants to stir up shit. Probably best and wisest to ignore it, though if I had superpowers I'd be just as happy to kick that behavior to the curb.

And not wanting someone to share - oh sorry, I mean advising them (despite that person being a fully competent adult) for their own good not to share - their good experiences is precisely and intentionally part of that behavior. Busted.

Two years later, in 1997, I went to New Haven CT to see them at Toads Place. We checked into our hotel and were on the elevator going to our room, talking about Dogstar when the other passenger said "I'm the bus driver." He was really nice and I have his name somewhere. I believe that Keanu was filming Devils Advocate in NYC. the show was great, we had a really good time and it was a bit noisy on the top floor of the hotel that night - that turns out to have been where they were staying. I picked it because i like cool old hotels and they had ROOM SERVICE (pretty good, too). the next morning, we were in the lobby and Keanu got off the elevator. 95x more gorgeous in person, seriously. He looked a bit sleepy but chatted pleasantly with us. I, at that time about as shy a person as existed, found myself asking "Keanu, can I get a hug?" (yes, I know. but that's what I did). He positively beamed at me - the most beautiful smile in the whole world - and said "Sure!" I've always been amazed and touched by his willingness - if he feels OK and time permits - to just hang out and chat. He did the same thing at a cool and rather strange club in the Laurentians. Just a really nice man.

I do believe that sometimes he's just tired, and occasionally he's just not in the mood, and that's his right - but the number of times I saw him being just lovely to everyone was amazing, and I've heard more stories like this than I can count.

So i'm really happy for you, Axie, and for your daughter "who's the guy in the suit?" too adorable. Because he seriously acts like a Dude. in a suit.

Oh look, that's KEANU REEVES, the "movie star" - and that's one of the reasons he's so loveable.

That said, I do agree that:

1) When you share personal experiences online, you take on the risk of people reacting badly, and it was unfair that your suggestion of being more discerning with sharing private information online was taken as comparable to silencing women over domestic abuse and rape. But if someone has experienced being told to keep quiet over the latter, being told to keep quiet over anything can trigger those same reactions, and is understandable.

but also

2) We're all adults here who are aware of that risk, and I'm sure axie knew what might happen when she posted her experiences. That didn't mean that those insults were deserved, and she was still right to be angry at that. But neither does that mean she should just stop sharing her happy experiences (or any experiences) altogether. There will always be people - even those close to you - who react negatively to anything you write or share online or offline, and it shouldn't be a reason to keep quiet.

One thing about the internet and any written communication is that it's very easily misinterpreted, and enough studies have shown that one's mood heavily influences how one reads the exact same sentence: for instance seeing a kind or neutral comment as an attack if you've had a bad day. So: try to give everyone the benefit of the doubt, always. If you're right, no harm done, and if you're wrong, you'd still have halted the potential escalation of conflict.

And be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle. And sometimes we take that out on people who don't deserve it.

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It can be successfully argued that Reeves only wishes to be deciphered to a certain degree, but that's cool and very respectable.

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True, that.
Then again, I've always taken that as a challenge ;)
And I'm trying to decipher as much as possible of what he chooses to share. AND of what slips (intentionally or not) over/under/through those walls of his ;)

And yeah, it is a challenge, a puzzle to decipher. I love puzzles! And challenges, we may recall, are really "opportunities."

@MmeRenard:Aww, that's a lovely experience! Everybody has bad days, negative reactions sometime stem from the attitude and approach of the other person too! Richness of character can be gauged by how a person treats people who he or she has no reason to be nice to and that being the measure, Keanu is probably one of the wealthiest. Am glad and grateful to be one of the select few to have realised this.

@MmeRenard - yes. Most celebs manage to be nice at least some of the time, just like most people in general. But with Keanu, I've heard only a small handful of negative stories, which serve only to prove the truth of the good ones: people aren't just making this stuff up and there isn't some huge PR conspiracy, as might be suspected if we only heard 100% good things.

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But neither does that mean she should just stop sharing her happy experiences (or any experiences) altogether.

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Thanks Ani and that's why it took close to two months to post about it here.

@Bliss I am very private in many, many ways but very vocal in other ways. I have shared elsewhere my personal experiences of d/v, rape [20 years ago by the ex husband] and abortion. I share it to help others know they aren't alone. Again, only used those examples because they are extreme and sometimes it takes an extreme example to get a POV across.

I posted about DS days in Aus and W. Hollywood. The 90s tho.
Will add more once I heal from the whirlwind holiday I just took. 2 days beach side and historic district, forts, lighthouses and hundreds of photos.
With Fibro and a damaged spine?! I'm in agony but it's a sweet agony.

@Ax~ I am a private person also, so soak that thought in a little bit. I don't understand the way you think and I don't trust you at all. Many times I felt bad for you, now... I just see drama. I was trying to be nice after you freaking sent links of my social media accounts to people. The games you played, and the LIES!! I still felt bad, like an Idiot, blew it off. You are a trouble maker and somehow twist things to where you are the victim. Leave me out of whatever you are doing. I honestly don't even care.

Thank you for such lovely words. I do try to find happiness in all things great and small. Had a blast taking shots the last few days, going over them today. I'll link my flickr a/c here once uploaded. Working on uploading now.