"The last time you made just a passing reference to KR, one of his defenders was on the thread within minutes, or possibly seconds. It's like a kind of Keanu SWAT team. I love it!"
Far out in a small unregarded corner of the Internet lay a message board frequented by about twenty or so regulars. Years spent in unyielding defence of one of the most maligned actors in Hollywood had hardened most of them into cynical misanthropes whose hope in humanity was steadily diminishing with each repetitively-uncreative and usually arboreal insult.
One of them - a hapless Singaporean student who takes everything too seriously - decided that having a website to link to would save a lot of time and trouble, because there're really only so many times one can insist on Keanu's lack of plant cells before one starts getting mad and destroying furniture.
Thus began WINM in January 2008, initially consisting of no more than a stock supply of counterarguments against common attacks on Keanu's acting. At WINM, we win 'm, and the webmaster swears that the original tree-inspired colour scheme was completely unintentional.
Banded together by this site, we grew more ambitious and started spreading out into the rest of the Internet in search of people or articles that unfairly insulted Keanu, whereupon we would either debate them in comments or get 'em via the privacy of e-mail. One day, someone dubbed us the 'Keanu SWAT Team', and so that is the name that we now go by.
Eventually - in the space of less than a year - the site grew past its original purpose of defending The Anu against those who would see him out of Hollywood if they could. It mysteriously extended into a full-blown fansite, and is now one of the most prominent Keanu-focused places on the Internet. Among other things, WINM includes the largest Keanu Reeves articles and interviews archive to be found anywhere on the web.
These things happen. No one quite knows how.
For those who have incredulously wondered how much time we spend on this, we appreciate your concern, and would like to say that most of us are perfectly functional human beings. No, we are not a bunch of unemployed slobs sitting in our parents' basements and munching on chips. My parents don't have a basement.
For anyone who wants to know, we are not in any way officially affiliated with Keanu Charles Reeves. Most likely he does not know we exist. It's probably a good thing. We might scare him.
The Original Keanu SWAT Team
We've since grown beyond our original number; basically, everyone who's a member on this site is technically a member of K-SWAT. The full member list is available here.
|Reconnaissance, Ground Assault and Technical Support||ckage|
|Website & Tactical Aid||Anakin McFly|
|Fiercelyred (German-to-English), EllieP (German-to-English), Sephonae (Spanish-to-English), keanugirl76 (Italian-to-English)|
|Artillery Support||Steanu, LuxN, lanathegreat88, keanugirl76, tiikay, EllieP|
|TDTESS Pond Outpost||SuchAPotsie, MissLilly|
|Homebase Defence||lefty10, pretendyouredead, TheWyleyOne, Speed_of_Late, mz_black, noodnix, EverythingIsMagic, Jakuja, personality_disorder|
|Honorific Member||Rob Mailhouse, because he once swallowed a goldfish.|
Imaginary Backup Staff to Make us Look Bigger than we Really Are
|Technical Support (2)||Thomas A. Anderson|
|Public Relations||Tom Ludlow|
|Medical Services for Injuries Sustained from Public Relations||Dr. Julian Mercer|
|Exorcism Services in Case the Medical Services Did Not Work||John Constantine|
|Legal Representative for Suits Due to the Above||Kevin Lomax|
|Insurance to Cover Above Costs||David Allen Griffin|
|Dentist to Scare Children||Dr. Perry Lyman|
|FBI Agent||Johnny Utah|
|Complaints Department||Marlon James|
|Complaints Department Bodyguard||Jack Traven|
|Complaints Department for Complaints about the Complaints Department||Bob Arctor|
|Sex Appeal||Ortiz the Dog Boy|
About the Webmaster
When not defending the good name of Keanu Reeves, I'm a minorly-published science-fiction writer currently working as a web developer and copywriter at a financial advisory firm in Singapore. One day, I hope to write movies for Hollywood and thus take over the world.
Keanu Fan Since: July 2004
Keanu Films Watched: 41
Favourite Keanu Films: The Matrix, Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure, Speed, I Love You to Death, The Devil's Advocate, The Night Before
Least Favourite Keanu Films: Dracula, Point Break, The Matrix Reloaded, the 5 minutes of Johnny Mnemonic I survived through. I will attempt to watch the whole thing one day. Some people claim it's good. But those people also claimed that Point Break was good and that I have horrible taste.
Favourite Keanu Character:
Conor O'Neill Neo
Favourite Dogstar Music: 32 Stories, Cornerstore, Enchanted